Winners focus on winning, losers worry about losing

Alot of stuff has been written on the difference between winners and losers and many think they have the answer.  More than one book has been published with the title "The Winning Mindset" and I'm sure many speakers have been paid thousands of dollars to pontificate about it to large audiences.  A little revelation I had recently has helped me alot, and has also come up in conversation often recently, so I feel compelled to blog about it.

Remember when you were learning to ride a bike, you were taught to keep your head up and look down the road, to where you were going?  The theory is, if you look down at the ground beneath you, that's where you'll end up.  Same thing if you're walking a tight rope - don't look down.  You might find that really difficult to do because you're instinctually afraid of falling.  So you focus on "not falling", and often end up falling.  It's very disheartening. 

Well, the same thing applies to all situations in life.  If you focus on "not failing" or "not losing" you might find yourself failing or losing more often than you like.  What I suggest you do is focus on succeeding or winning.  Think the difference between not losing and winning is insignificant?  Think again.  Here are some more examples that are near and dear to me.

Losers are looking at the stock market worried about losing more money they already have.  Winners are finding opportunities to make money in this market.  

Losers are working hard to defend their jobs finding all the reasons why they've been treated unfairly, or why failures aren't their fault, for fear of being blamed and ultimately losing their job.   Winners are looking for ways to perform above the expectations of their employers, to learn and find new ways to challenge themselves, to progress to greater responsibilities. 

Losers focus on protecting themselves in a new relationship, and hold back for fear of being hurt again.  Winners are excited about this relationship being more than they could ever have dreamed of, and don't hold back.

Does this mean to win you need to throw all caution to the wind?  Absolutely not.  Focussing on winning means looking for the winning formula.  The winning formula includes ingredients for "not losing".  Unfortunately, if you're just looking for the "not losing" formula, you might find it, but be advised that it doesn't include any ingredients for winning.  

So, I ask you, are you trying hard not to lose?  If so, maybe you should think about trying hard to win instead.